~He Let Me Live~
Personal Testimony of Candice Godsey
I grew up in a Christian home, and was a good teen-ager. I honored my parents, and I valued my family. I wouldn’t dream of ever doing anything that would upset my family, and most especially my mother. I was the kid who would never touch a beer or cigarette, and would tell my mom if my sister did. (Sorry Sis)
All good things must come to an end, right? I learned how much fun drinking that beer and smoking that cigarette could be. Almost every night, after work, was party night. Soon my thoughts were not controlled by my conscience at all, but only of flesh. Society actually promotes those thoughts today. I began living an alternative (bisexual) lifestyle, and having no respect for marriage, or for other people’s feelings besides my own. I was living every moment for me. I believe that Satan was using me to lead people to sin. I knew it all, and I could do it all. Nothing was out of my reach.
May 12, 2000 at 26 years old, I suffered a massive stroke from a dissection in my vertebral artery. The doctors told my mom that I was a “miracle”. They kept telling me how lucky I was to have lived instead of bleeding too death, and how I was moments from death before my stroke actually occurred. I kept wondering after that day why God had let me live, and what he kept me alive to do. I remember when I was holding my grandma’s hand while she was dying, I was thinking “maybe this is why he let me live, so that I could comfort her” or thinking while I was sitting by Lyn in the hospital bed, “maybe he let me live to stand by Lyn and be there for her while she’s sick.”
I started coming to this church because my friend Lyn had gone here in the past, and felt comfortable coming here. Since she was sick, I agreed to come with her, only to encourage her to go. I’ve grown up Baptist, so a Pentecostal church was a little different for me. The presence of God was all over this church. I could feel it from the very first service. It was such an overwhelming love from the members, and an overwhelming feeling of God’s presence.
One morning, after weeks of sitting in church thinking it wasn’t the place for me, it finally hit me. Even though, I had far outgrown my party years, and was no longer engaging in a lesbian relationship….. I was still in favor of those things, so there WAS something out of my reach. Heaven was out of my reach. THIS is why God let me live. THIS is why I was given another chance. The Lord wants me to turn this thing around, and turn my life over to him. I struggled with the thought of going to the altar to repent. I didn’t want to admit that I didn’t have it all under control in my life. One Sunday I knew that I couldn’t wait any longer, or deny what God was telling me any longer. I went to that altar and I asked God to forgive me for my sins, and to forgive me for leading anyone else to sin. From that day on, I started daily r epentance, and daily praise thanking God for his mercy, his grace, his forgiveness.
I was born again this year (2006). I want to share with anyone who will listen how God has changed my life, how God has changed my thoughts, how God has changed my goals, how God has changed my actions, how God has changed my feelings for others, how God has opened my eyes to what he wants from me. My heart melts when just one person that I invited walks through the doors at Calvary Tabernacle. I want everyone to feel this peace that I am feeling. I feel like I was hollow without God, and he has filled me with this feeling of true love. I look at everything with new eyes. I don’t have the desire for worldly acceptance. I want new things in my life. I want to keep growing in my relationship with Jesus, and keep my eyes on the truth. I’m seeking his acceptance, for my eternity. God is so awesome. I would never have been able to make changes in my life using my own ability. I can only fight with the strength that Jesus Christ has put in me. I know I have a great purpose for being where I am today. And I’m holding up my hand up to Jesus daily for strength and guidance to do his will. I’ve had people ask me if I believe I was “brainwashed” into making these changes in my life….and all I can say is what a wonderful washing of the brain Jesus can do. THANK YOU JESUS – HALLELUJAH!
Candice Godsey
The following is the testimony of a young man that visited our church a few times before he had to go to jail. He wrote his testimony in hopes that it will help other young people not to make the wrong choices that he did.
To whom it may concern:
My name is Robert Hammonds Jr. I am 22 years old, and am currently serving time at Piedmont Regional Jail. I am writing my testimony to share to those willing to listen so that people hearing this, especially the youth won’t won’t repeat my mistakes.
As a child and teenager growing up my parents raised me in the church. I felt the Holy Spirit everyday and loved God. I sinned but I repented whole heartedly when I did and tried my best to obey the scriptures.
I was very overweight from around the age of 12 until I was 18. At 18 years old I weighed 365 lbs, but in November of 2004 my health insurance allowed me to get the gastric by pass surgery. I was also attending college at the time. I started in the spring of ’04.
8 months after the surgery I had lost 150lbs. Had almost finished my degree in information systems technology. I was hired for a good paying job at the State Prison, and was attending church regularly feeling very blessed.
After I had been working at the state prison for a few months I bought a mustang GT and was put on a regular shift where I had to work 2 weekends a month. Then I started missing church to go to work. I figured it was only 2 Sunday’s out of the month, and I needed the money. I can tell you now, this was my first big mistake, my first turn down the wrong path.
A few weeks later, now in the fall of ’06; I ran into some old friends from high school. They congratulated me on losing the weight and the job and car. Afterwards the invited me to a keg party or party with a lot of alcohol. Told them I didn’t drink but they said I didn’t‘t need to. Just come hang out, talk, and catch up with old friends. It was on a Friday night. I didn’t have plans so I figured why not? I can say this was another mistake, heading further down the wrong path.
Of course after getting to the party everyone there pressured me to drink, and I did. I’m not going to lie I had a good time, felt like I had made a lot of friends that night, if I only knew then. At the party I met a very attractive girl who seemed very sweet and nice.
Started hanging with the girl a lot, and hanging with those people often. Fell away from the lord’s way and started following worldly ways. Stopped going to church altogether, went to parties, with drinking often.
By the time I turned 21, January of 07, I started going to bars. I got my own place to get away from my family and be around those friends more. I had also fallen for the girl I was hanging with all the time now. I had told her that I wanted to wait until I was married until I lost my virginity. However, I also let her know my feelings for her. She used my feelings as a weakness, anytime she wanted me to do something. Saying “If you really love me you’ll do it”, sometimes even crying.
Started out by having pre-marital sex, then onto other things. First she told me she did drugs, telling me only one type at first then others later. Afterwards, pressuring me to do it and I did. Then started hanging with people, other friends of hers doing drugs. Even buying a tattoo after buying her 2.
In the summer of 07, I went to a bar to hand with a friend in Chesterfield, who I met through her. Both of us drunk a lot of alcohol. I told him I couldn’t drive, so he said he could and only lived 5 minutes away. Which he did only live 5 minutes away. We even made it there. However, while pulling into the driveway at 5mph he hit a mailbox, tree, and ditch totaling my mustang. Then this friend of mine at the bar while I was at the bar buying his drinks had now stopped answering my calls after I got the car towed and a ride home. Would even write a letter to the insurance company for me.
After this I bought an old Jeep to get around in for the time being. A few weeks later while hanging with the same girl, she was complaining about her car not running and couldn’t get it fixed. She asked me to stop by a dealership while we were out, which I did. Wanted to get another new car for myself, instead I let her talk me into buying her a car she picked out. Some time after that a cop called me and asked me to come talk to him. The girl’s mother accused me of stealing Zanex pills. Come to find out the girl stole them from her mother and told her she didn’t know what happened. The truth came out and charges were dropped.
I felt at the time like if you truly loved someone you should forgive them because if its true love nothing should change that. However the love was one way and I should have realized that long before I did. A month or so later she was kicked out of her moms, she moved in with me for a while. Then on day she moved out, said she was moving to her dads. Two of her friends called me and basically told me she was lying and to go check a place out. The place was her ex boyfriend’s house, where the car I brought her was parked.
We pretty much stopped talking after that, I got my car back, but she kept a laptop and dog I brought her. At this point in my life I was use to doing drugs, drinking, and partying. Felt like I wasn’t even doing anything wrong.
Three of her friends that became my friends moved in with me, none working. Living a life of sin for a few more months. Did just about every drug I had heard of, got so drunk some nights passing out in the bathroom. I slept with a few more girls, as well during that time not many though. That seemed to bother my conscience more than the drugs and drinking for some reason.
On September 30, 2007 things went really bad. That week I had got into it with the guys staying with me. Continued to tell myself and them we needed to quit doing drugs. I was also tired of them using me. That Friday when I got home from work they were all gone. Didn’t think it was that bad. Figured they just moved out. On Monday I found out one of them had stolen my grandmothers credit card she let me borrow. He told the others it was his money he got from selling drugs.
He took the other guys who were staying with me and a girl to the mall, bought clothing, jewelry, tattoos, shoes and more, altogether spending over $5000. After confronting him about it, he admitted to it, and pleased for a chance to pay the money back. I talked my grandmother and persuaded her to wait a week to press charges. Working in a prison, even as mad at him as I was, I didn’t wanna see anyone I know wind up in a place like that.
The week ended and he continued to ask for more time without paying anything. ON October 6, 2007 my grandmother pressed charges on him for credit card fraud. On October 7, 2007, he called me when I got off work, told me to meet him at a store that he had the money.
When I arrived at the store he told me he had all the money except $500. Told me he needed me to get him 3 grams of cocaine so he could cut it and sell it to make the rest of the money. The drugs cost $165, he gave me $180 said he didn’t have change just spend it. We called a woman who could get the drugs from the dealer, he wouldn’t deal with us. Though we might turn him in because of the credit card incident. The woman we called wanted a gram for getting it. He told me he couldn’t leave, because his parents didn’t want him gone long. He lived next to the store, so I trusted him and took his word.
I met the woman at another gas station, where she told me she needed gas money. I used the extra $15 to get her gas. I then went with her, picked up the drugs and came back to the store we met at. She took a gram, gave me the other 2, and left. I went back to him with the other 2. After I handed him the drugs, I was busted by the cops. Turned out he set me up so he wouldn’t get in trouble.
I was arrested for distribution of cocaine, direct sale. I confessed to everything, was totally honest. Let the police look at my cell phone without a warrant. When it was time for me to be booked, they didn’t have to pick me up. They called me and I came to the police department. After being bailed out, I showed up to each court appointment on time. Still after I plead guilty, my bond was revoked. I have been here since then; that day being March 6, 2008.
My lawyer told me I should have received an accommodation charge since I didn’t make a profit. However, he said he couldn’t get the prosecutor to lower it, because the prosecutor said that I made a $15 profit. I was told to plead guilty and everything would be easier on me. I get sentenced on May 29th.
After I was busted, I lost my job, car, house, and now, my freedom. For the first month after I saw the old friends, but tried to get them away from drugs. I have not and won’t use another again. Out of the dozens of supposed friends I had using, I got 3 to quit or as far as I know of. After that I stopped talking to all of the rest.
Started going back to church, was hired for another job, and stayed home with my family otherwise. Even after everything God still blessed me when I came back to him. I met 2 wonderful and beautiful female friends. Both in church, God loving, and caring. One has stolen my heart and helped me find the Holy Spirit again.
Since being locked up I have continued reading the bible, praying, and doing what I can to stay close to the lord. I would attend church service if they had one here. I have even started a little bible study with a few inmates in my pod.
For those of you who have been and/or will be tempted by the worlds ways, remember what you were taught in church. Place God first above all else, don’t skip church unless it’s an absolute emergency. Also watch what company you take up. Most of the time if you’re at 2 different levels, either they will bring you down or you will bring them up. Especially be careful of who you trust because of this.
Here are some scriptures to help through times of temptation. John 14:23 Jesus says, “If anyone loves me he will obey my teachings”. If you truly love Christ remember you should want to follow his ways and words.
-If you’re tempted with money or material things including skipping church to work for extra money, remember Luke 18:18-27 A certain ruler asks Jesus “Good teacher what must I do to inherit eternal life?”. The ruler then tells Jesus he follows all the commandments, has since he was a boy. Jesus hears him saying this and replies, “You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come follow me”. When the ruler heard this he was sad because he was a man of great wealth. Jesus then looked at him saying, “How hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of God”.
-To those tempted by alcohol Isaiah 5:11-12, “Woe to those who rise early in the morning to run after their drinks, who stay up late at night till they are inflamed with wine. They have harps and lies at their banquet, tambourines and flutes and wine, but they have no regard for the deeds of the lord. Proverbs 23:30-35 “Do not gaze at wine when it’s red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it goes down smoothly! In the end it bites like a snake and poisons like a viper.
-To those tempted by immoral sex I Corinthians 5:13-16 “The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the lord, and the lord for the body. By his power God raised the lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the member of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become flesh” Proverbs 5 “For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave. She gives no thought to the way of life; her paths are crooked, but she knows it not.” “Keep to a path far from her lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel, lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich another man’s house” “Drink water from your own cistern running water from your own well. Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. May your fountain be blessed and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. May you ever be captivated by her love? Why be captivated by an adulteress? Why embrace another man’s wife? The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him; the cords of his sin hold him fast. He will die for lack of discipline, lead astray by his own great folly.
My point is keep your faith close, listen to the holy spirit and don’t be lead astray, if you truly do love Christ and value you and your family’s well being. For Jesus looks after and blesses his people like a shepherd to his sheep. However, a true believer in Christ will follow him just as in his days.
Do not pity me, I am confident now. The truth of that night will come out in court for God does not allow those to speak lies or wickedness of his followers; Psalm 107. Things can get bad in here but I’m never lonely. For I know Jesus is with me for I believe and love him. When things get tough around here though there’s a few scriptures I turn to for comfort. The main on being Psalm 23.
I’m sure I will be released on May 29th with time served. For the lord will see I am sincere in what I say that I have changed, and it will be known to the judge. Remember John 3:16 “For God so love the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in him shall not perish but have everlasting life”. God has given so much and done so much for us. Wheat excuse can we have not to love him and follow him. Especially when it only benefits us.
May God bless all with a good and true heart that try their best and always believe.
